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Our Love Affair with Magazines, Strippers, etc.
Chelsea Charms - Dec. 6th-8th, 2012 - Déjà Vu, Saginaw, MI
Déjà vu pitch: They say there are two types of men, ones who prefer butts, and those who prefer boobs. Well, if you are in the latter category Déjà Vu Showgirls in Saginaw is bringing it to you in spades...153XXX spades, that is! Thats right, the gigantic jigglers of Chelsea Charms are busting through (literally) the doors of the Vu and in your face! Now is your chance to get into the orbit of the worlds biggest breasts and drown in them titties as Chelsea performs nightly December 6th, 7th & 8th! It sure is going to be a merry Titmas season!

I made the trip to Saginaw on 12-6-2012. MapQuest projected a 77 mile trip / 1hr 20min. In reality: 72 miles / 1hr 15min

I got to Deja Vu at 9:03PM. Had a pleasant chat with the door man. Paid the $15 cover and entered (first time in a strip club in perhaps 10 years). Sat close to the stage. A beautiful Elf (one of Santa's Helpers) waited on me. I knew there was no alcohol as I'd been told that Chelsea's second act was at 2AM, not that I'd have been drinking. Either way, I figured I'd be drinking $7 Cokes. Was amazed to find that all drinks were free. I gave my Elf a $5 tip (which seemed to amaze her) then had to kill an hour or more watching some of the plainest, small breasted women that I've ever seen at a strip club. I saw finer women while sitting on a bench at the mall yesterday.
First show: Chelsea wore a Swiss Maid outfit (red c white flowers, white trim). After perhaps a minute, she picked me as her first conquest. She knelt in front of me, grabbed my head with both hands (at this point, I told her that I'd been dreaming of this since 1999!), pulled me into her monstrous cleavage and shook her breasts from side to side rather gently. My hands came up to the sides of those puppies and I got a double handful. After seeing over 10,000 photos and over 500 videos of Chelsea, I was still amazed at how big she was. I was also quite concerned that she may have gotten old and fat (like me). No such thing...she looked as young as she did 6 or 7 years ago and her tummy was back to fighting (and fucking) size. She took off the blouse and soon after that, the halter (The Hauler?). Her tits were huge and beautiful and Huge and HUGE! Guys were getting (bare) motor-boats for $1 so I put down a ten and got a long tit job. She started laying guys on the floor and giving them the full workout like in the Kama Sutra video for $5. I jumped on that opportunity (for another $10). She ended by throwing small posters to the loudest revelers...I won! It was a photo from the Paisley Halter PhotoClub set.
About 15 minutes after the show, Chelsea sat at a red velvet booth where she posed for Polaroids and sold stuff. After waiting for the small crowd to die down, I moseyed over to have my prize signed and to have a couple Polaroids taken ($10 each). I then mentioned that I wished that I had an hour to talk to her. She gave me a funny look and moved on to the next guy. Now I was feeling sorry for myself for being out-of-line and back at my seat I kept peeking over at her. Her customers died out and she sat there for quite a while, alone most of the time. I kept thinking, this is a perfect opportunity but I'm afraid of her reaction. I mean, there sat my all-time Dream Girl, naked, save for bikini bottoms, only about thirty feet away and I wanted to talk to her or just sit down and stare at her until she left.
Second show: After a seemingly endless ordeal of the same bunch of dancers plus an amateur night contest with four even worse girls, 2AM finally came around and Chelsea came out wearing the silver top she wore in the Kama Sutra video. Underneath was a yellow outfit (halter and skirt). This time she stripped totally nude (only wearing her famous gold waist chain). NOTE: she hasn't shown her snatch in photos since her first couple years in the business (1999-2000). I got a $5 motorboat and was planning on some sort of $10 job but she stopped the contact sports and started a new game. She had a tumbler with 8" 3-D cock on the side. Holding the cup between her breasts, she knelt down and had guys throw wadded up $5 bills at the cup. Those that holed the bills got posters. I didn't care to try as I already had one (not realizing that these were different from the first batch). I gave a fiver to my new buddy Anthony to try but he missed. When that died down she left the stage for good leaving a lot of us holding bills in expectation of more tit jobs.
Back on her velvet seat, Chelsea was again in business. I waited for the new crowd to disperse then thought I'd try my luck again. I came up with a new pose for another photo and then asked if she had a few minutes to talk. You'd have thought I was the President. The dancer Chelsea had been talking to just turned away and the bouncer/photographer pulled back the gold post holding the velvet rope to let me in the booth to sit by Chelsea. We talked for perhaps 30 minutes then some other guys came along to have their stuff signed. While she was taking care of them, I looked through her album of photos, mouse pads and magazines. She had the elusive March, 2000 Score (I had just seen a used copy online for $95) and a Buxotica, Score Special #59 I already had but didn't recognize (guess my mind was elsewhere). I was almost afraid to ask how much she was asking for the magazines but I had to know. Ten bucks - everything in the album was ten bucks. I bought both and asked if she had more with her but I already had the only one she had with her on this trip. She signed the mags (just her name). I hope that makes them more valuable...I know having a guy's name on the mag lowers the value.
Since the MC had mentioned that Chelsea would be available for Private Lapdances (Going rate at Deja Vu is $100 per half hour) I asked her about the possibility. She said her rate was two for $100, the two being two songs (I figured anywhere from 6 to 8 minutes which would range from $1000/hr to $750/hr, $750 being exactly what she charges for a one-hour Private Dance). I truly didn't think it through because I should have done it. I had the money in my pocket but couldn't pull the trigger. This turned out to be my only regret from the entire experience. Fortunately, she had mentioned that she would be in Lansing in February...I'll be there...with money for a dance or two! Note: Not one person had a dance with Chelsea the night I was there.
I thanked her for the lovely talk. I told her that someday I'd be healthier and would finally partake in a full hour Private Dance. We shook hands and I left.
Back home in Oxford, I licked my lips and thought I tasted lipstick (but, I hadn't kissed anyone). I then realized that it was her body lotion from that last tit job. I could still smell and taste her. If I only knew how to bottle it!

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RE: Our Love Affair with Magazines, Strippers, etc. - by titzling319 - 05-25-2020, 04:25 PM

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